Something to Tell You
The Road Families Travel When a Child is Gay
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Something to Tell You by Gilbert H. Herdt
Book DescriptionEven now, at the end of the twentieth century, many still have difficulty standing up and saying, "I am the parent of a gay child." Something to Tell You recounts the stories of families whose lives have been touched by the discovery that a child is lesbian or gay-how it affects and influences people's perceptions of their children and even changes the self-image of parents themselves. Focusing on fifty average families-not people seen in clinics or therapy-the authors found a consistent pattern of change: first negative, then positive. Sometimes the news led parents and siblings to form stronger bonds with the child, with each other, and with other relatives and friends. In many cases, their child's partner and partner's family grew to assume an important role in their own lives. In some cases, parents and siblings discovered new meaning in their lives through speaking out or joining PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) and becoming part of the struggle for lesbian and gay rights. The authors found that families committed to staying together are typically able to overcome the powerful obstacles imposed by society. Something to Tell You also shows the lasting and sometimes tragic consequences for families who falter in the process of integration. Unwilling to accept their child's sexuality, some parents sought to blame each other, and all too often their own relationships unraveled as a result. Others who failed to tell close friends sometimes lost those friends through keeping secrets. Parents who neglected to form bonds with their child's partner fostered climates of alienation that persisted for years. A richly diverse collection of family stories, Something to Tell You is a book that will help break down widespread prejudice and put an end to destructive cultural myths. It affirms families' highest aspirations toward active love for their gay children, showing the steps to take toward new levels of support, solidarity, and love.
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Book DetailsISBN: 9780231104395
(229mm x 152mm x 11mm)
Imprint: Columbia University Press
Publisher: Columbia University Press
Publish Date: 8-May-2001
Country of Publication: United States
Books By Author Gilbert H. Herdt
Sexual Inequalities and Social Justice, Paperback (December 2006)
Signals the emergence of a different paradigm of social analysis committed to understanding and analyzing social oppression in the context of sexuality and gender. This collection of ten essays illuminates the role of sexuality in producing and reproducing inequality, difference, and structural violence.
Gay and Lesbian Aging, Hardback (November 2003)
The year 2003 marks the 30th anniversary of the landmark "declassification" of homosexuality as a disease by the American Psychiatric Association - a watershed in the lives of gays and lesbians in the US. This volume deals with the issues concerning the health, mental health, and concomitant special social service needs of this population.
Sambia Sexual Culture, Paperback (August 1999)
This collection of essays on the sexual culture of the Sambia of Papua New Guinea examines: fetish and fantasy; ritual nose-bleeding; the role of homoerotic insemination; the role of the father and mother in the process of identity formation; and the creation of a "third sex" in nature and culture.
Same Sex, Different Cultures, Paperback (April 1998)» View all books by Gilbert H. Herdt
"Because homoerotic relations can be found in so many cultures, Gilbert Herdt argues that we should think of these relations as part of the human condition. This new cross-cultural study of gays, lesbi"
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Author Biography - Gilbert H. Herdt
Gilbert Herdt is director of the Human Sexualities Program at San Francisco State University. The author of a number of books on gay men and lesbians, including Same Sex, Different Cultures: Exploring Gay and Lesbian Lives and, with Andrew Boxer, Children of Horizons: How Gay Teens Are Leading a New Way Out of the Closet, he is also the editor of numerous volumes including Gay Culture in America. Bruce Koff is the former executive director of Horizons Community Services, the largest social service agency for gay men and lesbians in the Midwest. He is currently on the faculty of the Chicago Center for Family Health of the University of Chicago and maintains a private psychotherapy practice specializing in work with gay men, lesbians, and their families.
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